The Newtown, CT massacre affects us all. I first heard about this devastating elementary school shooting soon after it happened through a text message from a relative in Italy. Rarely does local news make European headlines unless the news is massive. I was in a training at work, where of course, there was no radio on; no TV. As soon as I finished, walking back to my office, I noticed how the entire hospital –staff and patients alike, were abuzz—not so much in a curious state, as in solemn state of mourning.
Research shows that all of God’s creatures—humans as well as animals—mourn when they lose one of their own. It doesn’t have to be a relative, friend, or even someone you know, to feel empathy and the heaviness of loss vicariously. Wherever I went that day, hearts were heavy, and emotions were that of horror, as well as sadness.
No one can imagine what it must feel like to have been directly impacted by the Sandy Hook Elementary shooting first-hand. The parents and families of the children and adults who were shot; the surviving children who witnessed the shootings, and of the police and ambulance workers who were involved—will no doubt face a long and arduous journey of healing.
So what can we—those who stand in the periphery and beyond the physical boundaries of Newtown—do to help those most deeply affected, and to help ourselves get through the devastation that we feel in our solidarity with the people of Newtown?
Focus on inner peace in order to stay strong and be able reach outward and help in ways that make sense:
Go inward for Inner peace. Don’t neglect your own self-care in times of crisis. You will do the most good for those affected directly if you keep yourself centered and strong. Some ideas are : Lighting a candle at your house of worship, 10 minutes of daily meditation, reflection on the blessings of your own life, prayer for the Newtown victims and their family, and surrounding yourself with life-affirming beauty — a flower on your table, your favorite family photo placed right where you can see it, seeking a support group or a professional to talk to if you need it.
Go outward for ways to help: In the coming days we will most likely hear of ways in which those outside of Newtown can help. As with the victims of Sandy, there may be donation funds set up, or physical help that might be needed. You might consider making a donation to a children’s charity in memory of the victims, or even volunteering for a legitimate charitable organization that needs your help– as a symbol of gratitude for the blessings in your own life.
In the coming days of our own holiday celebrations, let us take this time to remember how connected we really all are—through our earthly journey of both sorrow and joy. In tragic moments that don’t make sense, let us become the pillars of strength that comforts others. And in moments of joy, let us remember to appreciate and share what we have been blessed with.
I pray that our friends in Newtown find comfort, peace, help, and healing in this most devastating time of crisis.
About the author
Dr. Raeleen D’Agostino Mautner is a self-help/personal development expert, speaker, certified Life Coach, Psychology Instructor, and Producer and Host of “The Art of Living Well”. She is the author of a few successful books, including “Living la Dolce Vita: Bring the Passion, Laughter, and Serenity of Italy into Your Daily Life“, has been quoted in many publications, including Family Circle and First for Women. She has written for Psychology Today, The Chicago Tribune, Quirks Market Reearch, The Italian Tribune, America Oggi, and Italian America. Dr. Mautner has made guest appearances on numerous national radio and TV programs. Visit her website: https://raeleenmautner.com
In her latest book, “45 Ways to Live Like an Italian“ will inspire you to adopt the sweetness of Italy and begin to notice the small daily details that turn ordinary moments into extraordinary experiences, ultimately making your life richer, more enjoyable, and less stressful.
“Lemons into Limoncello: From Loss to Personal Renaissance with the Zest of Italy”. This extraordinary book by Dr. Mautner will help ease recovery and renewal for readers who are going through loss, change, or transition and is all about rebuilding your life following adversity. The cultural wisdom, comfort, and (extra)ordinary Italian lifestyle habits presented can help you re-establish your passion for living.
This is a highly recommended book by Italia Living’s Founder/Executive Director, Richard J. Michelli.
